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Sunday, December 4, 2011

Cultural role model or a father figure to the fatherless?

A few days ago I ran into a single mother I hadn't seen or spoken to in a long, long time.  During our discussion, I asked how her young son, whom I had a sports coaching relationship with in the past, was doing.  She mentioned he just had a chance to connect with his father (absent from son's life) and it was a huge disappointment.  The father at the end of the process made this comment to his son, "I wish your mother would find a good man to date or marry so that you will have a strong role model."  I know that this comment can be construed as a man humbly admitting his faults, not in this case.  This was honestly not the case here, it was more of an attack on the mother who has raised their son alone all of his young life.  Is this father absolutely refusing to look in the mirror?

To address this question I want to present you and excerpt from my book (written in bold below) which drives this blogspot.

“In 2008, 75 percent of White, non-Hispanic, 64 percent
of Hispanic, and 35 percent of Black children lived
with two married parents.”

The statistics listed above amaze me on all fronts about all the races but none more than the African-American homes of which are 65 to 70 percent single-parent. Of that alarming number, 96 percent of those homes are fatherless. Firstborn son, do you understand what a position of godly privilege you have to correct this situation? Do you understand how powerful you are in your ability to directly address this crisis in our community? Your acceptance of the role and godly endowment bestowed upon you puts you in the position to speak into the lives of those that surround you and are counting on you. This godly endowment also means that you have your house in order and have risen to the level of a man above reproach. Your selfless and sacrificial role renders you readily available to intercede prayerfully for those seeking your advice. The hardships sons of the African-American community have endured over centuries puts them in some of the greatest positions to handle great obstacles and rise to the occasion as heroes. However, because we lack the understanding and knowledge of Isaiah 55:8-11, the miraculous way in which God prepares us that sometimes seems greatly illogical from the human perspective, we more frequently assume the roles of victims. Oh, how we’ve bought the lie at such an incredibly high cost!

Here is my challenge and my call to reason to you on this topic: You and I will quickly attest to the fact that an incredibly high percentage of the world’s dominant performers and achievers in high pressure and stressful situations come from some of the lowest slums, ghettos, and misfortune our world has to offer. Without statistical research, I will go out on the limb to say 90 percent of categories I am referring to in making my point come from this segment. At one time they were at or below the poverty line. I am speaking of professional athletes, those in basketball, football (NFL or Soccer take your pick), baseball, hockey, and so forth. I am also speaking of the military, the marines, special forces, navy seals, and so forth, just to name a few. These are people that come from or are cut from the same cloth, that of poverty, as you were perhaps. And we quickly offer them world class influential status. Sadly sometimes it is simply out of material success rather than credible virtuous substance. Nevertheless, how rapidly they rise to “hero” status. But I have to admit, they do not accomplish the feat with such grace without incredible resilience achieved by the hand that life dealt them in the slums and ghettos of our world. Why then do you feel that same resilience will not work in your favor; you who don’t have the same material wealth?

God's wisdom challenges human logic.

In the included video, we take a few minutes to discuss the definition of the term "role model" relative to today's culture.  I pray you can find a tip or two within...