January Is National Mentor Month

I wrote the book (The Firstborn Son: a Curse, a Gift, or a Calling) because of my desire to mentor others coming after me. I have spent several years as a youth athletic coach and have been blessed with some wonderful friendships and relationships. The youth and adults have taught me some amazing lessons. My vow to them is that I will live a life that will not bring shame to them. Especially for the youth, I will live an exemplary life that will allow them to consistently have a source of mentoring. It is amazing to hear a young man say, ―I thank you for being the consistent male figure in my life even in the tough times.

How about you? Why are you a counselor, teacher, adviser, coach, trainer, or mentor to another life? In the same breath why have you as a scholar, trainee, student, novice, or an apprentice sought the advice of another? What if mentoring was actually designed more for the mentor instead of our common assumption that it benefits the apprentice most? It is no question that a mentor gives advice to one or many who follow his/her lead, techniques, theories, and more. Yes indeed, there is an aura of blessings to be transferred from the life of the most experience or predecessor to the successor. Yet, let’s not dismiss or misplace the power of monuments.

A statue, building, or other structure erected to commemorate a famous or notable person or event is a monument. The mentor’s ability to teach effectively always relies on monuments of events he/she has erected in their lifetime. These moments are commemorated either to remind us never to return to the pain of such a circumstance, or embolden us for the future mountainous obstacles we are yet to encounter. These are memorials which have taught incredible personal and/or professional lessons. It is critical to remember they are simply memories which have no power to define us, especially if painful memories, noting life’s rapid changes. The life of a mentor is empowered most by the legacy and exemplary life he/she must live daily despite past failures or accomplishments. The mentor must live in the eternal now in order to make the greatest impact.

Take note of the following conversation between a mentor and his apprentice (2 Kings 2:9-10):

⁹ When they had crossed over, Elijah said to Elisha, “Ask what I shall do for you before I am taken from you.” And Elisha said, “Please, let a double portion of your spirit be upon me.”¹⁰ He said, “You have asked a hard thing. Nevertheless, if you see me when I am taken from you, it shall be so for you; but if not, it shall not be so.”

Elijah refused to let his mentoring impact on Elisha rest on all of the great things he had watched him (Elijah) accomplish by God’s power in the past. It all rested on assurance he would receive from God in that moment.

If you like this post visit The Firstborn Son website to join our email list, find more resources, as well as see if we are speaking in your area soon. Kudos to organizations like @mentorNational, and Washington State Mentors.

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What September 11th, 2001 & Selfless Military Service Cost The Family

As we respectfully honor the 11th anniversary of September 11th, 2001, arguably the greatest attack and offense of war on American soil, our hearts unite in a special way today with families who are forever impacted by that event.  I am writing about families of civilian occupants of the airplanes used on that tragic day, the buildings (New York City & the Pentagon) attacked, selfless first-responder firemen, police officers, and other emergency personnel, as well as military lives lost in wars which have come about as a result.  We must spend some time in prayerful memory for those lives.  Far too often, and even including me as write at this moment, we fail to fully grasp the width and depth of that event's impact.

Freedom isn't free, as a matter of fact I believe it has the greatest price tag anything could possess, life.  No greater cost was paid for ultimate freedom than Jesus Christ giving His life away in death for you and me. This morning I had the chance to get out of bed on my own accord at about 5:00 AM, gather myself and what little wit I possess at such early hours, and choose to meet a group of about 30+ friends for and hour or so of intense basketball games.  Some of these friends are some young men in their teenage years whom I admire. The amazing contrast and reality check for me is at the age they are, and in my life in those late teenage years I was being awaken at about the same time of the early morning by the sounds of surface-to-surface missiles being launched at the direction of my home.  Unlike today, back then and some 20+ years ago I was forced to awaken into instant alertness or to determine whether there was a need to take cover from a bomb falling upon my head, as well as those of family members.  Many lives were lost because of the reality and existence of evil and sin in the heart of men, and for the cost of peace and relative freedom which currently exist in my home country today.

While our hearts unite with families affected by the losses of men and women that have come about as a result of September 11th, 2001 and the many tears and emotional struggles we have not seen or those we have, we must remember the reality that We Also Serve: A Family Goes to War.  We must recognize the impact of war on the American family and all others involved including the enemies, not merely by the death of a soldier, but the impact absence during deployment, the political discourse for and against war which ensues within families causing separations, and many more effects.  I got the chance to pick up my three year old son from pre-school today and we wrestled on the living room floor very affectionately until we fell asleep (him lying on my chest) together.  He told his mom a few moments later that sleeping on daddy was very comfortable.  Many will never get that opportunity as adults or children because they have been robbed of that opportunity by the evil causes of war and events such as September 11th, 2001.

We Also Serve: A Family Goes to War is a book written by Nanette Sagastume who was a guest on a recent episode of my BlogTalkRadio show, The Firstborn Son Show. Please take a moment and listen to the interview and enlighten yourself.

The Attitude and Approach To Prayer

In recent weeks I have struggled with a bit of disconnection spiritually with God the Father.  It is not that I am not frequently opening my bible, but instead there is a funny feeling because I lack the sense of a pull into deeper fellowship with Christ that one gets from a deeper, intense, and personally specific ongoing topical or book of the bible study.  Honestly, on multiple days of the week I am involved in various rich bible study times with the book of Daniel (men's discipleship group), facilitating a phenomenal biblical leadership series (www.transferablecrosstraining.org/leadership.aspx), facilitating an awesome marriage group (Love & Respect), and so forth.  But nothing beats direct, purposeful, intimate, consistent, and intense one-on-one time with God, hence my comment.

Then comes the National Day of Prayer, which I willingly prefer to embrace as the National Week (if not month) of Prayer, but who asked me for my opinion right?  All around the country on this day, Christians are gathering to petition God the father that He protects and guards the land, its leaders, and so many other aspects of our existence.  It is my personal and primary hope that we pursue this discussion first and foremost by each individual from the origination of self, to family, community, city, state...right on up to the president of this great nation, as well as the impacts beyond these borders.  But what is our attitude and approach to an effective prayer, and prayer life?  In my introspective time, the Lord took me to the book of Luke, chapter 18 (Luke 18).

I believe the Lord through the writings of Dr. Luke uses several parables and incidents to help us examine our manner of approach in prayer.  I do not intend to explain it all to you, instead I will hint at my impression and take-away from the passage.  However, I will strongly advise you to read the scripture and make note of what the living words of the bible speaks to your specific situation.  As I said earlier, mine was a place of a bit of a lack of intimate and intense personal connection.  What has yours been, or what is yours?

Approach & Attitude to Prayer in Luke 18:

1. Luke 18:1-8 - Persistence (Do you feel you've prayed for the same thing too long (years)?)
2. Luke 18:9-14 - Reject Arrogance, Approach in Humility
3. Luke 18: 15-17 - Assume a child-like trust in God (blind and innocent faith)
4. Luke 18: 18-26 - Let go of earthly possession or prayer; God will infuse heavenly treasures
5. Luke 18:28-30 - Understand & Know that God "PROMISES" better returns
6. Luke 18:31-34 - Be assured of His promises which is never dependent on your understanding
7. Luke 18:35-43 - Persistence re-emphasized; but be sure to give glory where due

I pray this blog gives you a greater insight, examination and authenticity to your prayer life than you have ever taken before.  More importantly, I pray the scriptures will empower us all to a more powerful utterance of prayer for our families, cultures, and nations.

Cultural role model or a father figure to the fatherless?

A few days ago I ran into a single mother I hadn't seen or spoken to in a long, long time.  During our discussion, I asked how her young son, whom I had a sports coaching relationship with in the past, was doing.  She mentioned he just had a chance to connect with his father (absent from son's life) and it was a huge disappointment.  The father at the end of the process made this comment to his son, "I wish your mother would find a good man to date or marry so that you will have a strong role model."  I know that this comment can be construed as a man humbly admitting his faults, not in this case.  This was honestly not the case here, it was more of an attack on the mother who has raised their son alone all of his young life.  Is this father absolutely refusing to look in the mirror?

To address this question I want to present you and excerpt from my book (written in bold below) which drives this blogspot.

“In 2008, 75 percent of White, non-Hispanic, 64 percent

of Hispanic, and 35 percent of Black children lived

with two married parents.”

(www.childstats.gov)



The Childstats.gov statistics listed above amaze me on all fronts about all the races but none more than the African-American homes of which are 65 to 70 percent single-parent. Of that alarming number, 96 percent of those homes are fatherless. Firstborn son, do you understand what a position of godly privilege you have to correct this situation? Do you understand how powerful you are in your ability to directly address this crisis in our community? Your acceptance of the role and godly endowment bestowed upon you puts you in the position to speak into the lives of those that surround you and are counting on you. This godly endowment also means that you have your house in order and have risen to the level of a man above reproach. Your selfless and sacrificial role renders you readily available to intercede prayerfully for those seeking your advice. The hardships sons of the African-American community have endured over centuries puts them in some of the greatest positions to handle great obstacles and rise to the occasion as heroes. However, because we lack the understanding and knowledge of Isaiah 55:8-11, the miraculous way in which God prepares us that sometimes seems greatly illogical from the human perspective, we more frequently assume the roles of victims. Oh, how we’ve bought the lie at such an incredibly high cost!

Here is my challenge and my call to reason to you on this topic: You and I will quickly attest to the fact that an incredibly high percentage of the world’s dominant performers and achievers in high pressure and stressful situations come from some of the lowest slums, ghettos, and misfortune our world has to offer. Without statistical research, I will go out on the limb to say 90 percent of categories I am referring to in making my point come from this segment. At one time they were at or below the poverty line. I am speaking of professional athletes, those in basketball, football (NFL or Soccer take your pick), baseball, hockey, and so forth. I am also speaking of the military, the marines, special forces, navy seals, and so forth, just to name a few. These are people that come from or are cut from the same cloth, that of poverty, as you were perhaps. And we quickly offer them world class influential status. Sadly sometimes it is simply out of material success rather than credible virtuous substance. Nevertheless, how rapidly they rise to “hero” status. But I have to admit, they do not accomplish the feat with such grace without incredible resilience achieved by the hand that life dealt them in the slums and ghettos of our world. Why then do you feel that same resilience will not work in your favor; you who don’t have the same material wealth?

God's wisdom challenges human logic.

In the included video, we take a few minutes to discuss the definition of the term "role model" relative to today's culture.  I pray you can find a tip or two within...



What it means to be Courageous!

This is an interview that I was blessed to be invited to.  I spoke with Rich Hallstrom and Mike Stacy of Motivation With a Purpose radio (http://www.motivationwithapurpose.com/ or http://www.corsicafoundation.org/) on 1150AM KKNW in Seattle, Washington about what it should mean to be courageous in America.  This is a tremendous discussion that I pray you will gather a lot of direction from for your life, and those of your dependents.  What we spoke of also centered around topics I have written about in my book The Firstborn Son: a Curse, a Gift, or a Calling.  You can certainly get more information at my website http://www.thefirstbornson.com/, as well as more information about my book at http://www.thefirstbornson.net/. 

http://www.motivationwithapurpose.com/2011/11/what-it-means-to-be-courageous/

What does "legacy" mean in and for your home (family)?

I had the opportunity to spend some time with radio host Doug Bursch of "Live from Seattle" on KGNW 820AM.  We talked about how the concept of the "firstborn son" impacts, and is incredibly far reaching within multi-generational family legacy.  Our culture has damagingly neglected this concepts which now impacts our homes to the tone of societal statistics such as teenage pregnancies, drug abuse, incarcerations, child abuse, domestic abuse, divorce, and more.  I know you will find a lot of substance in this interview.  You may fast forward to the second hour or about the 55th minute if you do not desire to listen to the initial segments but simply my segment.  The podcast you seek is November 3rd, 2011 and there is a rebroadcast on November 22nd, 2011.

http://www.kgnw.com/podcasts/podcasting_localhost.aspx?localhost=59